Tags

>I don’t know about you, but the first paragraph hook was so helpful to me! I know so many of you have written me telling me the same thing … I’d love it if you could also go to Seekerville and tell the ladies the wonderful job they did πŸ˜‰

What did you learn about your critique? I’d love to hear! For me, I learned (hey – is learnt a word???) the importance of tightening each sentence, making each word count.

Ok … I know you all wanna know who won and why she won. I think you’ll agree when you read her opening that her hook is fantastic. If you don’t want to read more after this hook then … well, I don’t think that will happen πŸ™‚

Ok … the winner is … Georgia Downer πŸ™‚  

Here’s her hook and comments:

“Alive?? All of them?”
“Yes m’am, you heard correct. They’re here, just like I promised.”
So began one of the longest, hottest, learning experiences of my life.

This definitely has me hooked. I want to read more. The third line is more telling, but I see it’s non-fiction, so I think that’s probably fine.
 
Great opening line! You hooked me right away!
 
Very nice.  Only use one question mark after the initial work, Alive.  You’ve hooked me!
 
Interesting opening. I’d read on, just to find out who’s alive, and what’s going on.
 
Intriguing first line. And I just have to know more!
Advertisements